Purging Bad Karma!

So this is my blog. I’m going to discuss my daily life so you can laugh with me (or at me) to make yourself feel better about your own. Aaaaand GO!

My mom taught me a very important lesson growing up. One day, I asked why there was no food in the fridge. She said, “when I go to the grocery store and buy food, you guys end up eating it. Then I have to go back again.” Point well said, Mom. I haven’t been to a grocery store in a month because when I buy food, I pretty much immediately eat it. Not stocking your fridge toootally cuts down on midnight snacking!

Last night I came home to an empty (well, my shelf anyway) fridge. I was going to call it a night, but my roomie’s peanut butter kept calling to me. So, I stole the jar from the fridge. Since I get up earlier than she does, my evil plan was to eat a few spoonfulls, keep the jar (evidence!) in my room, hit the gym in the morning, swing by a grocery store on my way back home and replace said PB jar before she even woke up. Genious, I know.

I have this habit of midnight snacking that for some reason I don’t really feel the need to work on. I stole the aforementioned PB around 11 last night (keep in mind this IS the kind that needs to be refridgerated), ate a few spoonfuls, and kept the rest in my room. Around 1am I woke up and ate a few more spoonfuls, then again around three, aaaand again around 5. Each time the consistency got a little… soup-ier.

6 am rolled around out of nowhere! I threw on my gym clothes and bolted out the door, feeling stoked that I was going to make the gym 4 mornings in a row. Woo! I hopped on the treadmill and 42 minutes in started to feel a little queasy. Right after I stepped off, I knew what was coming… like when the toilet’s just ABOUT to overflow and you know the point of no return is inevitable because you waited to long to shut the water off, hoping it would just level off at the last second. YAK!!!!! I barfed EVERYWHERE… AGAIN!!!

Some of you guys may remember a Facebook posting I made last year about how I got sick WHILE running on a treadmill (same gym of course, apparently I have no shame). You don’t realize how fast those conveyer belts really go until you watch your own chunks hit them and proceed to get catapulted onto the innocent victim behind you.

So, after making the walk of shame to the locker room I showered, got changed and drug myself to Trader Joe’s… where they just happened to be OUT of peanut butter. This was the first hour of January 7th. Stealing gave me salmonilla. Nice.

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